fried chicken

Greasy, salty, hot, steamy.  I get excited about it more than a proper woman should. 

But I don’t really know how to make fried chicken.  Yeah, I know the basics: the ingredients, the process, the end result.  But starting with Point A and ending with hot and greasy goodness in my mouth… we’ll just say there’s room for improvement.  I have made fried chicken one time.  It was when I had just one babe and seemingly all the time in the world to devote to making dinner.  I started with about a dozen drumsticks, soy milk (no dairy or egg coating for this family), flour, salt, and pepper.  I added some panko breadcrumbs (the only dairy-free breadcrumb on the market as far as I know) and a bit of Italian seasoning just because I could.  I heated the oil, dipped, breaded, and fried.  I fried, fried, fried.  Wearing an apron as to protect my $10 t-shirt from grease splatters, I started to sweat.  And swear.  After what was I am sure was 45 minutes, I had finished frying like 4 pieces.  By the time I had finished the final batch, the oil was so littered with charred little breading bits, the house smelled like burnt nastiness for godknowshowlong. 

We ate the chicken.  The chicken itself was fine.  It was good, really, but nothing spectacular.  Nothing that would warrant ever again spending that much time standing in front of a stove, with hot grease popping onto my arms.  Never again, I swore.  Frying is a man’s job.  (Along with grilling, taking out the trash, and killing bugs.)

So here we are.  My fried chicken fantasies are only fulfilled on the occasional visits to a local restaurant, Frank & Helen’s Pizzeria (OK, technically it’s broasted chicken (fancy) but omg, amazingly good), or the one-off chance that I snag some at say, a family reunion?  4^th of July party?  A summer BBQ?  I never get invited to those.  But I refuse to sell out and hit up Kentucky Fried Beaks.  Place just scares me.

So I beckon you:  Please.  Tell me about YOUR amazing fried chicken-lickin.  Is yours a tried-and-true classic fried chicken?  Is it crazy crunchy or do you have a great technique for spicy breading?  I want your recipes, tips, and suggestions.  And home-delivery.